Standard Operating Terms & Limitation of Liability

DoNotAbduct is a parody registry. Your filing fee buys a digital record on our list, a clearance code and downloadable credentials. That is the whole product. It is not insurance, and no government, agency or extraterrestrial body has agreed to honour it.

Registration does not protect you from anything, physically or financially. No claims, compensation or payouts are available for abductions, probings, missing time, crop damage or unwanted cattle relocation.

Visiting entities are politely requested, but not legally required, to consult the list before beaming anyone up. Liability for off-world events is excluded to the maximum extent permitted by Earth law. Complaints must be lodged in person at the nearest mothership.

Nothing in these terms excludes or limits any liability that cannot lawfully be excluded, or affects your statutory rights as a consumer. These terms are governed by the laws of England and Wales.

Your registry entry costs $9.99 per year and renews automatically each year until cancelled. You may cancel at any time by contacting support; cancellation stops future renewals. Digital content is delivered immediately on purchase.

Terminology and atmospheric classifications are aligned with public DoD/AARO reporting standards and National Archives UAP records. DoNotAbduct is not affiliated with, endorsed by, or connected to any individual or organisation referenced on this site.